THE WINNER?

A San Diego highway patrolman pulled over a driver and told him that because he was wearing his seat belt, he had just won $5,000 in a safety competition.

"What are you going to do with the money?" the officer asked.

"I guess I"ll go to driving school and get my license," the man answered.

"Don't listen to him," said the woman in the passenger seat.

"He's a smart aleck when he's drunk."

This woke up the guy in the back seat, who took one look at the cop and said, "I knew we wouldn't get far in a stolen car."

Then there was a loud knock from the trunk and a voice asked in Spanish, "Are we over the border yet?!?!?!?!?!?"

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Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Tennessee State Lottery?

The winner gets $3 a year for a million years.

Justin Illusion...