WHAT TIME IS IT?

While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den.

"What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked.

"That is the talking clock," the man replied.

"How's it work?" the friend asked.

"Watch," the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear-shattering pound with the hammer.

Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, "Knock it off, you idiot! It's two o'clock in the morning!"

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Quote

Why do men snore when they lie on their backs?

Because their balls fall over their assholes and they vapor-lock.

Justin Illusion...