MERGERS

In the wake of the Exxon/Mobil deal and the AOL/Time Warner deal, here are the latest corporate mergers we can expect to see:

1. Hale Business systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush and W.R. Grace Co. merge to become Hale Mary Fuller Grace.

2. Polygram Records, Warner Brothers and Keebler Crackers merge to become Polly-Warner-Cracker.

3. 3M and Goodyear merge to become MMMGood.

4. John Deere and Abitibi-Price merge to become Deere Abi.

5. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco and Dakota Mining merge to become Zip Audi Do Da.

6. Honeywell, Imasco and Home Oil merge to become Honey Im Home.

7. Denison Mines and Alliance and Metal Mining merge to become Mine All Mine.

8. Federal Express and UPS merge to become Fed Up.

9. Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge and begin manufacturing reproductive organs.

10. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will merge and become Fairwell Honeychild.

11. 3M, J.C. Penney and the Canadian Opera Company will merge and become 3Penney Opera.

12. Grey Poupon & Dockers Pants will merge and become Poupon Pants.

13. Knotts Berry Farm & National Organization of Women will merge and become Knott NOW.

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In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.

Like, THAT makes sense!

Justin Illusion...